Ask me about my Humility

Recently some friends of mine were talking about how this would be an awesome bumper sticker. I agree, I would laugh and honk if I saw it.

But this is not how humility works. It has been said the minute you got it you have lost it. But is this really true?  Is humility so elusive that you can't really even talk about it without failing the test and losing any credibility to speak on it?

So before I continue I want to emphasize that I do not think that I have it down. There, am I qualified to go on?

No I struggle with pride as everyone does. I own a mirror just like you do. Is the fact that I write a blog mean I am smug jerk who thinks he knows it all? Perhaps, but I am trying. Does that confession mean I am now humble? No, it may be elusive, but it can be talked about, because it is so important.

Humility is not simply an attitude or else we could easily attain it. Humility is a decision, but not simply one decision but ongoing decisions to not exert or demand your way of thinking. This gets hard because sometimes there is a right way to think on something and if you agree with this way of thinking then it becomes your way of thinking and then I fail the test again, Dang!

But thankfully humility in verse form is spelled out for us by the Apostle Paul in Philippians 2.

3Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, 6who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, 7but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. 8And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

Great he brought Jesus into the mix, yes Jesus, Jesus himself is the ultimate example.  We cannot obviously follow this specific example of giving up on the benefits of Godhood and becoming a mere human, but he does get the point across. I believe this passage reveals the parts of humility.  Verse 3 hints at our motivations.  Verse 4 hints at our actions. Verse 5 hints at a mindset. Verse 6 hints at selflessness. Verse 7 hints at servant hood. Verse 8 hints at obedience. 

These do not sound naturally fun. That is the point, being humble is not natural. We naturally want to look out for number one. Naturally I want my motivations to benefit me, my ambitions are about my prosperity.  Naturally I want my actions to benefit me, I want to improve myself, I want to be who I want to be.  Normally my mindset is set on me, I am selfish. I want to have servants rather than serve, I want others to listen to me, to read my blog? And nobody likes the word obey, we do not want to be obedient.  We react negatively to rules, this is that whole sin nature thing.   

So humility is the opposite of what I naturally want.  This is why James writes:

⁶ But He gives more grace. Therefore He says:
“God resists the proud,
But gives grace to the humble.

Proverbs 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom.
Proverbs 18:2 
Before destruction a man's heart is haughty, but humility comes before honor.

Jesus says talks about the importance of humility from Luke 18.
⁹ He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt: ¹⁰ “Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. ¹¹ The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. ¹² I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.’ ¹³ But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’ ¹⁴ I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”

Jesus' parable is very telling in regards to our sin and humility, it is not the one who doesn't sin but the one who admits it and asks God for forgiveness. Humility is the only way to repent of sin. Without humility we will live our whole lives apart from God because we will not see our need for him like what happened to the Pharisees. Humility is the only way to approach God, humility is the only way to possess faith. Humility is disarming. Humility is how you keep your cool under pressure. Humility is approaching God on bended knee and not with a closed fist.

God emptied himself.  This is not simply the "kenosis" passage for theological purposes, but God's own example of humility to us. He wanted a relationship with us so he humbled himself. God willingly limited himself to take on the likeness of man in humility to reach us. This is not just a useful virtue, this is the only way to have a meaningful relationship with God. As it was his way to have one with us.

If God actively resists the proud, don't be someone who God is against. That seems wise.

So I write today about Humility not because I have it down, but because it is so important.  

thanks

Hit you where you Live

Back when I was a youth pastor in Prescott, Arizona I had the privilege of co-leading a youth mission trip to skid-row in LA. There I met a man just out of prison. We had just finished conducting a service for some of the people in the community and I got to speak to the man afterward. He greatly appreciated the message we brought but he was regretting his life and lamenting that fact that he had wasted so much time. He was overwhelmed with sadness that he had not met Jesus until he was way past his mid-life and wasting away in prison.

I was overwhelmed and at a loss for what to say, but after we talked for a bit God brought this verse to my mind. 

Acts 17:26 And he made from one man every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined allotted periods and the boundaries of their dwelling place, 27 that they should seek God, and perhaps feel their way toward him and find him. Yet he is actually not far from each one of us.

I pointed out this verse to the man and explained that God graciously draws us to himself in the situations we are in.  I went on to explain that the verse seems to indicate that not only is God not far from us but that God orchestrated our each and every completely different situations. He not only set out the boundaries of our lives but the locations we would live on the earth.  He did this so that we would respond to him.

In other words God put us in the situations that we are in so that we would have the best possible opportunity to respond to his call. 

Along with the the doctrine of God's sovereignty this shouldn't be too hard to swallow. So I will just place these verses here.

Proverbs 16:9 The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps. 

John 6:44 No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him. And I will raise him up on the last day.

Ephesians 4:8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God,9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast.

What this means is there really isn't the situation of the poor tribesmen across the world who doesn't have the opportunity to hear the gospel.  Or for that matter a man trapped in prison away from the possibility of meeting God. He may very well currently have that problem but this verse seems to imply that God is ultimately not far from him. This is not to introduce deterministic language into the mix but for us to recognize God's hand even when we can't see it.

I believe that I am in the best situation to respond in faith to God. I like the idea that perhaps if my situation was different I wouldn't have responded to God's call in my life.  If I lived in The Hamptons and had a cushy life perhaps I would have never have recognized my need for the Lord. Or if I was raised in a poor third world country perhaps I would have simply followed the culture and not been open to other ways of thinking. Or if perhaps I was born in England, I would have been too distracted by mine and my fellow countryman's sweet accents to bother with Christ.

This is not to say people in those situations cannot find God as I previously stated, but for me I am in the best situation for me, so those others will not suit me better. I should not lament what could have been or be overcome with what is, but recognize I am a short prayer from reaching out to him where I am.

After our conversation the man was drawn to tears to learn that God may very well have been drawing him throughout his journey and not delaying him because of it.

God is not waiting for me on the other side of my problems, for me to get my act together, he is graciously drawing me to himself while I am in them. God is not waiting for us to arrive before he gets involved. God hits us where we live.

So when I look in the mirror I should say: "This is who I got to be, this is where I got to be, now what am I going to do with the rest of my life?"

I will leave with a quote from the J.R. Tolkien from the Lord of the Rings.
"I wish the ring had never come to me, I wish none of this had happened".
Gandolf responds. "So do all  who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide, all we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.  There are other forces at work in this world Frodo besides the will of evil..."

thanks

Worship (preference) wars 4 of 4

Of the many church problems one problem seems to always rise to the top. I have tried to emphasize the importance of Church unity already but this issue really needs its own blog. Why? Because music is a polarizing thing, it shouldn't be but in the church it is. Some like classic, some like instrumental, some like country? Some like pop. Some like hip hop, Some like alternative, yes! Not only this but there are so many sub genres of music that the ones I already mentioned are already archaic, it is impossible to keep up. Some like this, some like that, some speaks to some and some speaks to others. This unfortunately bleeds into the church when it comes to worship. Some is more holy than others, wait, what the!?

Some churches are not even aware of it while some are fighting over how it should be done. Some don't even realize that others do it differently. This seems to be the major problem. While some churches have the concert model down they don't realize others are still struggling to get there, or to get somewhere. We have failed to realize that we have made our music preferences into a war of worship. 

In our culture we have put our preferences of how it should work over what it actually is.

Biblically speaking worship is offering to God his due. On the most basic level worship is literally bowing down. Which person with what music preference would be more comfortable with a half hour of silence on your face in the sanctuary every week? In the Old Covenant part of this submission surrounded the offering system, this was worship, to offer his due of our allegiance, our repentance, our peace. But under the New Covenant we do not operate on the sacrificial system because Christ made the final perfect sacrifice of his Son.  So what do we do?

Well, another way Old Testament Jews worshiped God was through songs of praise. The book of Hebrews in chapter 13:15 affirms that this is what our worship looks like now instead of burnt sacrifice.  In case that is difficult, we have a whole book of music written to bring God praise. We have a whole collection of songs to God in the book of Psalms. Not to mention that many instruments are often assigned to play them and a church organ isn't one of them.  So we can safely agree that now worship looks like singing to God. 

Here is one of my favorites from psalm 118:

"A Song of Ascents. I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand."

The first instances of praise is simply the Israelites praising God for his victories by recounting his deeds when God delivers the Israelites from the Egyptians from Exodus 15.

20Miriam the prophetess, Aaron's sister, took the timbrel in her hand, and all the women went out after her with timbrels and with dancing. 21Miriam answered them, "Sing to the LORD, for He is highly exalted; The horse and his rider He has hurled into the sea."

We have two camps of worship unfortunately, one that believes it is better to sing theologically thick words with little variation in meter and tone while reading from a book, while the other camp is a little more free form with less theology and more emotion and modern instrumentation. 

Sometimes the two meet but not always. I am not talking about content of the actual song. That is a separate issue, a song with bad theology should not be used despite it being a hymn or contemporary tune.  But this is part of the problem. One kind of music is assumed to be better which is simply not the case.  Just because a song is newer does not mean it is theologically bad nor does an aged song mean it is theologically sound. The issue is bad writing not bad genre, let's stop confusing the two and making sweeping arguments for one over the other.  

The argument usually begins from the older generation liking what they are used to and the younger generation likes what they can relate to.  

Biblically however it seems to be a song either just reflecting God's deeds and attributes. Sometimes it is a lament that cries out to God about the pain and misfortune they are experiencing. The great thing is that it always ends with joy and with a recognition of God's greatness such as Psalm 73.

Worship is always about God but our wars over it have made it about us, our preferences, our feelings, our music. But worship is foremost about humility because without humility we can never ascribe to God his due worth. Without humility we are never concerned about anything but our self.

Let me add one more point to this which is hard to write. This unfortunately has ended up with old churches with little to no youth in them and young churches with little to no old people in them. With the mid-lifers having to draw lines in the sand of where to go. I have seen this many times across the country. Why? Because the music reflects the tone of the tradition and the tradition sets the tone of the decor. The traditional takes on the decor of a Cathedral and the contemporary takes on the decor of a concert hall. And the appropriate people report for roll-call. This is sadly a large degree of simply ageism in the church. Some churches wonder why they can't attract/keep certain demographics into their churches without realizing they have tailor made them for the people who are already there. Slowly the people who do not fit slide out the back door if they were ever there in the first place.

Now having preferences isn't really the problem as I have already said, we should have different churches with different flavors. This only becomes a problem when we have churches with people who don't want to share.

But if worship is about God then it isn't about what you prefer or what I prefer.  It is sad, but a blended service really should minister to us all, but it still bothers us if it isn't completely about us. 

Unless we can come to a cease fire and make some sort of agreement, we will continue to not worship, because his people are not looking up to him. Let's unfold our arms, un-clench out fists and raise up our hands to God. 

The style will always be the issue when God's glory isn't. So let's see about making worship about God again, then perhaps the style won't be as big a deal, because it isn't he is. 

thanks

Raging Against the Machine much? (numbers and disciples) 3 of 4

I wrote the previous blogs about different church experiences to point out that we are all different and have different filters from different experiences and backgrounds.  This was in hope for us to be better at gathering together. Gee, Gabe why it that? Well I frequently see open letters to churches about why they are doing a poor job and why people are leaving. These along with how to find a "better" church seem to be on the rise. This is really not surprising as the church is made up with people and people are not going to agree on a lot of things as I said.

Now it is one thing to want to find another church because of gross theological concerns, but often these are usually about preferences and offense. So after reading yet another article on how the church or leadership needs to change or else, I thought I would add a thought to the discussion.

It is true the church has been poor in some areas. Sometimes we are poor at love, sometimes we are poor at evangelizing, sometimes we are poor at charity, sometimes we are poor at outreach, and sometimes we are poor at worship (this is coming), and sometimes we are poor on the Bible.  

As much as I agree with some of this I think it is important to note that these types of articles seem to share a common denominator. They include that they at one point felt judged, or encountered something they didn't like, and then they proceed to finger pointing and departing. I am starting to get the feeling that these writers would rather that doctrine and sin not be talked about at all; and to empathize, I suppose I can sometimes understand that to a degree, but it really misses the point.  

We are obsessed with love in our culture. Which is not really a bad thing. But how some of the church seems to have adopted this mindset is that love is looking the other way and being as inclusive as possible. But for Jesus love was meeting people where they were at, for sure, (which we like) but he never failed to tell them the truth. (which we don't seem to like anymore). Jesus' exclusive message of the Father and himself divided people, further the doctrines from the Bible will contain some exclusive truths and theology as well.

When we treat Jesus like a one dimensional character like Cupid who is only concerned about "spreading love" we miss the point.  Jesus admits that what he is most concerned about is doing the will of his father. Fulfilling that will meant bringing a message and going to the cross. Both of those points were and are hugely divisive. That message was repentance and the kingdom. Repenting and joining the kingdom meant leaving things behind. Mathew left behind the tax collector life, the cheating and stealing and swindling his fellow Jews for money. The love is the sacrifice for sin, the calling is fellowship with him, and the relationship is following after him away from our selves. Romans 6 makes this clear.

So let's not confuse what love is. This confusion has led to the very issue of church's tailor making their services after felt needs. So then we get other articles that are pointing out that the church is shallow busy creating a big production and missing people. But could it be that church has fallen into being producers because the people have fallen into being consumers looking for their needs to be met?  

I am not saying this is right, but demanding that felt needs be met is another reason why the church is doing exactly that. For the church to be a body we need to pay attention to what the head who is Christ is saying. If God is bringing issues of sin up in his church then our response should be to repent, not whine about our toes getting stepped on and then leave and find another church that is more lax with that sort of thing.

It is sad, but if we are prepared to leave church because of an offense then some churches unfortunately will continue to change tactics to be as unoffensive as possible. And the ones that don't? Well they get articles written about them. But when did the church becomes about getting as many seats filled as possible?  The Gospel is an offense and a stumbling block. Pointing to sin and the need for a savior is offensive and has been driving people away since the time the Pharisees first heard it. But that message is also the same one that has been bringing people in. 

If you are a disciple then you will allow correction into your life. When challenges come you will meet them, when hard encounters happen you will work through them. When offense happens you will use compassion and grace to attempt reconciliation. When sin is addressed you will seek forgiveness. In short, you will grow. But if you are a merely number in a church, then you will leave when uncomfortable and find another church to add to their count.  

My point is not that we shouldn't encourage our leaders to do better, as I have already added my own critique, but church will probably always offend in some way.  We need to work on this internally.  Not leave and then hurl criticism from the outside. As Christian leaders we should be working for more than increases in numbers and people should be desiring to become disciples closer to Christ. Are we going to be a family and stick it out, or are we going to take our spiritual toys and go home?

It is so easy to blame institutions for personal problems but institutions are made up of other people. The church specifically is not an institution but when articles are written this way it makes them out to be. It seems to often follow the rebellion of rock n' roll against "the man". The church gets equated with being "the man" so of course we should rally against it!  But the church is not "the man" but it is about a man, Jesus. So when we are quick to pick up stones against it we should really consider what Jesus said about it.

Jesus tells us that his church is the group that he if for on the earth. The church is the ones who will not be triumphed over by evil. The church is the one that Jesus left behind to carry out his will. The church is the bride of Christ. So before we rally against her let's remember what we are doing. We are actively raging against the body of Christ. We are actively warring against his bride to be. Christ does not want his body abusing itself. Christ wants his body at harmony with the head which is himself. Christ is not angry with his body and disappointed with his body. Let's stop threatening to take away the golden lamp-stands before their time.

It is easy to draw lines in the sand with ambiguous institutions, but the church is you and me. The church is the people and we are all a part.  If you want change then be the first to do it. But do it while you are a part, not after you have written them off.  This is how gossip is minimized and relationships are restored. But when you do, make sure you are wanting change in accordance with the head who is Christ. A church attender always complaining about the church is as out of place as soldiers on a aircraft carrier rocking-out to Rage Against the Machine. 

Now before we say "well if I am the church, then what's the problem?"  The answer is because finger pointing is not self criticism. The Church is a body as we gather together and not as we depart. These open letters and articles pointing out the reasons for leaving, and affirming them, is simply under-girding the emerging philosophy of the church which is "If you offend me I will leave". This is not unity nor is this helpful. Let's work on these problems together not after we have jumped ship.

Christ's prayer before he went to the cross was for our very unity, because he knew that our tendency is to depart, just as the writer of Hebrews also reminds.

So before we encourage more dismemberment, remember: A dismembered body is a corpse. In our critique of the church are we contributing to life or death? If the church is you and me, who exactly are we Killing in The Name of?

thanks

The 3rd Guy goes to Church (2 of 4)

The guy walks into the building and sheepishly looks around and walks forward as a hand is shoved into his hand.  The guy at first is taken aback at the treatment but looks up to see the genuine smile on the owner of the hand and his defenses fall.  "Hello, welcome to church."  The guy returns the handshake and greeting and makes his way to the back on the left side of the auditorium and takes in the massive room.  As the man walks through the auditorium he notices the massive curtains covering old stained glass and has to stop and take a peak at the old artwork now covered over. 

The guy sits down listening to the pumped in music at just the right level to still accommodate conversation. The guy places his coat on the seat next to him to make sure no one sits beside him. The lights fall and everyone stands, so he does too.  A familiar sound fills the room, had he heard this on the radio or something?  The guy at first does not sing as he feels silly but he starts to sing when he notices that he really can't see anything and that probably nobody can see him also.  The guy finds that singing is actually a bit enjoyable even though the words are a bit distant to him.

The next song starts and he realizes that he didn't recognize the last song but just that these songs all seem to sound similar.  The third song starts and while he still did not know the song he was confident he could follow the song fairly well. This time he starts paying attention to the words he was singing, which were very positive he thought.  The guy noticed how all the people on stage were significantly more attractive than he was.  And even though nobody could see him in the dark room he was reminded that he needed to work on his weight. The guy sat down feeling a bit uncomfortable but he was disarmed again when the dressed down pastor came out on stage and communicated with the demeanor of a kind father, one that the guy assumed all these other people had.

The pastor began pointing to the Bible passage on the screen and after reading it he began telling a story. The guy paid close attention while the personality of the pastor worked his magic and continued to disarm the guy and make him feel welcome. The guy was a bit taken off guard when he actually related to a story that the pastor told and smiled as he thought that this pastor was a bit different from those other priests.

The pastor continued and the guy began to have positive feelings about God that he had not thought about since he was a kid. The guy surprised by his own receptiveness smiled again as he thought that there was something to this Christianity. The guy wondered if he was being had and looked around to see if everyone was looking at him. He calmed himself when he realized that other people were just as engaged as he was. The guy appreciated the humble approach of the pastor and attentively listened to the rest of the sermon.

Afterwards another man came up asking for money with the music playing again, but the guy appreciated that he had said for new comers to not feel compelled to give as it was a privilege of those who claimed the church as their home. When the service ended the guy wanted to approach the pastor and thank him but the room was crowded with people talking.  The man stood and looked for a moment and he decided that maybe next week, he would.

Humility

In these three different stories, three different guys attend the same service in a church.  These are not meant to sum up all church experiences but to pinpoint some different specific perspectives of the visitors.

The first visitor was a guy new to church with no way to interpret this foreign experience. One would say he was simply ignorant of church culture which is fair to say about anyone new to church.  But his problem was not his lack of knowledge only, his problem was the way he already thought he knew what church was all about. It was because of this "background" he had a hard time figuring out the new experience. His perceived knowledge of church mixed with his ignorance of how to interpret made it more difficult. He had some assumptions to work through. He was confused.

The second man was a classic example of a cynic/proud man who believed he knew what church was all about and had already made judgments about the whole experience. He didn't believe he had any ignorance or need and therefore did not have trouble interpreting.  He knew already what it was about and thus his experience of church went accordingly. He mocked. There are people in attendance who do this as well.

The third guy was clearly new to the experience but he displayed a basic openness and a teachable spirit. He possessed humility you might say.  He was able to accept the service as it was and with this he was able to take something away from it. He may come again. He grew. This is the type of person we hope all visitors to church are like. But they aren't.

These were not different services catering to different people but different people interpreting their experiences. Unfortunately we can't always reach everybody, so all we can do is serve the Lord as best we can. All we can do is trust that God will draw those who he will draw. That is not an excuse but it is simply to say not everyone is going to agree on church and that should be OK.

Outsiders are not going to agree on church and neither do the insiders.  These were examples of outsiders interpreting church, but insiders have the same issues.  In fact some of these types of people are also inside the Church and these people also affect the way visitors view the experience. Some are proud and want their way. Some are humble and always give in. Some are ignorant and don't see why any of it matters. Some are there going through the motions. Some are there wondering what lunch will be and if a certain other person has come today.

Guests and members both have their opinions and preoccupations. As much as outsiders have preconceived expectations and experiences, surprisingly even so do people who are already in attendance.  As uncle Ben said to Peter Parker "With great experience comes great preference." (he didn't actually) But with different people come different feelings of comfort and desire and background. This is why it is important for churches to remember that they are a body. Different parts are different.

Shoulders like to be rubbed but bellies do not. Cheeks appreciate being squeezed but double chins do not.  Hair likes to be combed but ankles do not. Heads like to be scratched but throats do not. And so on and so forth...

All bodies are different, all churches are different, because people are different both inside and out. People visiting are different and people regularly attending are different. We are all not going to agree on the carpet or the drapes, the chairs or the pews, the drums or the organ, the lights or the candles, the wine or the grape juice, the sacraments, or even the preaching. And the music, well? That is for another blog. But we just aren't going to agree on everything are we?

If we do not start remembering that we are a body with different parts then we may just start simply being a bunch of people jockeying for our sacred cows. This only appeals to other people with similar sacred cows. It is only as we stand together that our love communicates to the world. The church should be the one place where a little leg room is given. Where a little grace is given. If the body of Christ cannot get along then why should outsiders be interested?

I know this started out about the visitors but often we can get hung up on them.  We can't control the visitors can we? But we can address ourselves. If we are too focused on our preferences then someone may come to our church and simply leave confused. Or if we are fighting over our preferences than somebody will come and leave more cynical than they came.  But if we are humble in our approach to church and to each other, people that visit will see it and grow.

Our preferences may not appeal to the outside world but our love will, the Gospel will. So if the church cannot start granting grace to each other, if the body cannot take care to be understanding of each other, then the body will start to decay.

And we don't want visitors smelling dead meat when they visit, right?

thanks

A story of 3 guys visiting Church part 1 of 4

Church is complicated, everyone has a background, and everyone has a perspective. 

The guy walks in and gawks across the room that looks like a concert hall.  He thinks to himself that this church has money.  He looks around again and a nice looking gentleman approaches him and shakes his hand. "Welcome to church, is this your first visit?" "Well, Yes" trying to get away the man shakes off the small talk and moves off to the right. He finds a seat mostly towards the back and begins to watch. A few more minutes pass and more people fill out the room.

Then at the top of the hour the lights go dark and a man comes out on stage who he assumes is the pastor, but you wouldn't know it from his casual attire. The guy recognizes this for what it is, a disarming tactic for people who feel distant from anyone called a pastor let alone to God himself.  But it has the opposite affect. "Shouldn't these people have more respect for God?"  The guy looks around and realizes he is more dressed up than most of the people in attendance. The man gives his pep talk and then exits stage left as a young attractive man comes out on stage with an acoustic guitar and a big smile. He begins strumming the typical Christian sound that even someone not familiar with church recognizes; a slight pop rock sound but with an overall clean and tamed manner emphasizing the vocals over the music. At first the man was surprised that there was no pipe organ but he decides this will do.

As he then tries to sing some of the words he finds himself distracted by the large face of the attractive young man on the screen being projected behind the words. As distracting as this is he attempts to put this out of his mind. He closes his eyes to focus but when he opens them an equally beautiful girl had appeared on screen with a light now projected on her as she does her best Mariah Carrie impersonation.  The guy finds this distracting in a completely different way. But it eases his mind a bit and he finds himself mouthing the words along with her. Another two songs with pleasant sounding not imposing music and the guy is starting to enjoy himself.

The show ends and the lights come back on and everyone takes their seat. The host comes back out and then says some things about stuff that the guy has no knowledge about, logistics, he is guessing? Church meeting? Finally the man up front says he will speak out of the book of John and the words are immediately on screen.  The guy adjusts himself in the seat and leans a bit forward, this is what he came for, to hear some of the Bible that he has heard so much about.  The man starts by reading the passage and then immediate starts talking about his life and how God has done stuff. Then he continues, and then, he continues some more, and the visitor starts to think that the pastor will never come back to explaining what he has just read.  

Minutes slip away and the guy starts to feel a bit disappointed. He came here to hear about God, instead the pastor is selling himself.  He looks around and some people are engaged and still others are looking at their phones. The guy wonders how this type of message fills this large a room week after week. As he is thinking he is interrupted by clapping all around and he realized he has missed something, a punch-line perhaps? Many of the jokes already had gone over his head but perhaps this one hit home for everybody. He again tries to concentrate but he starts thinking about how attractive the girl singer was.  He quickly stops and reminds himself that his friend will probably ask him what the service was about, but he has little idea. 

The guy can tell that the pastor is now circling the last base and the conclusion of the message is coming so he pays attention closely.  "God loves you". He hears.  He tries to listen more but he gets very little of substance but once again the people clap and he realizes they are simply agreeing with his points not being told anything they do not know. This makes the guy feel more like an outsider because he does not get it.  It wasn't clap worthy in and of itself so he must assume he has missed something again.  He realized he cannot keep up as he can't relate to all the stories and cannot simply follow along in the text as there isn't any.  The guy resigns himself that he cannot get anything out of this.  

Then the services switches to asking for money.  

The guy looks around and almost laughs. "What do they need more money for? They seem to be doing just fine." The girl starts singing again and the guy wishes this was a social setting so he could go talk to her, not that he would have the courage to talk to her, still, she was pretty.  The service ends the guy sighs deeply and gets up to leave. This time nobody approaches him so he just walks out the door.

He is new here. Confused. Ignorance isn't always bliss.


And with that another Guy goes to church...

He reluctantly sits down having walked a long way around the edge of the room to avoid having to be greeted. He sits down and tries to look ahead to not engage anyone accidentally.  Unfortunately for him someone notices him and comes over to try and make small talk.  "Lovely, sigh..." " The well dressed man mentions the weather and talks about nothing at all, the visitor somehow navigates the conversation and puts his head down to not draw any attention, but this has the opposite affect. Someone else draws near, "Sigh...I was just noticing the casino like carpeting...".

The woman that now beside him repeats herself and asks if he is OK.  At first he doesn't respond, but realizes this is a mistake because the woman persists, so he disarms her quickly. " I am just tired".  He lies.  It is already 10:30 am, a very reasonable hour of the morning for anyone to be quite awake enough. No, he is not tired but he is not bothered with conversation.  This works and she eventually wonders off and the service succinctly starts.

The lights go dark and the guy is relived because now he can literally not see the people in the row right in front of him. The music begins and the guy thinks that it is just OK. He scrutinizes the words of each song and wonders if Jesus appreciates all the fluff. The band is full on now and he laughs to himself at the missed chords and missed opportunities. The man tries to peer through the darkness to see if anyone is engaging because quite frankly, he can't hear anyone singing.  He spots a few people a couple of aisles over who appear to be mouthing the words but there is a surprising lack of volume.  He somehow makes it through the worship and eagerly sits down.

The minister comes on stage wearing a bad tie over a dark shirt with a sport coat and blue jeans.  "He looks like he is going out to a bar to meet women." He thinks. The minister begins by talking about the Bible of which he carries none. And then says that God wants to talk to the people about love, the guy smirks to himself, "So, no substance then? Anyone can talk about love. But it's hard to do it when using your bible."

The preacher continues to talk down to the people in the audience while the guy looks around to see if anyone is buying into this. He is surprised to see some people seem to be enjoying themselves. "Simple minded I guess" he muses. As the preacher continues, he starts to pick apart the pastor, piece by piece. After a few minutes of this he notices something. The young people sitting grouped together to the left are not paying attention. The guy smirks again and leans back in his chair which was starting to feel pretty comfortable. As he did he also noted that this chair was much more comfortable than the last churches' pews. "Well that's at least something."

The pastor eventually gets over himself and stops talking. But another man comes up to speak while the worship team starts playing again.  This man precedes to ask for money and the guy smirks again.  "Yup this is what it is all about, not a chance."  The man crosses his arms. Then there is a video about some dude going somewhere else who also needs money.  "Get a job kid". As the basket passes the guy's demeanor hardens as he sees that people are actually dumping their money into the basket.  "If only making money was this easy for the poor huh?"  The service ends and the guy quickly raises from his seat and leaves the building . "Just as I thought, why did I bother?"

The guy leaves smiling to himself, but another person sees him leave and at noticing the guy smiling he assumed he has enjoyed the service and says a prayer of thanksgiving. 

Pride.

These guys don't go to church much, but even they need grace. One more visitor next time and some thoughts. 

thanks

On Love and Haircuts

With Valentines here a lot of people get excited and a lot of people groan. This is not a deep without words groaning that the spirit does while making intercession for us.  No, this is because we think the holiday is stupid or pointless or merely a paycheck for hallmark. Some are excited for a night of romance, some want connection, some are depressed, some are worried about paying for it all , some don't worry because they have convinced their significant other that it is pointless. And some are actually excited for the 50 Shades of Grey movie?

So why groan? May it be because relationship are hard, or perhaps some of us are bad at them, and worse at learning about them? The Bible has something to say about that.

The Bible tells a story of a man who was driven by his passions. Samson is probably one of the best examples of a hopeless romantic in the bible. He seems to try and make it work with the wrong woman over and over again.  It ended very badly for him.

Here are some examples of the way Samson acted when blinded by lust:
Samson saw a daughter of the philistines and wanted to marry her despite her not being from their own people. Then Samson when to a prostitute in Gaza. Then he went to the valley of Sorek to live with Delilah a woman who continually betrayed him to the Philistines. 

What is wrong with this guy? But do we do much better?  What's wrong with us?

The Song of Songs is a book celebrating the love that God has gifted to a man and a woman. An underlining theme may be that perhaps we are bad at this? The book reminds us not to awaken love before it's time. But Samson would not have it. He wanted this girl no matter how much of a bad decision that was. He did not know it would cost him his life, as proverbs 7 reminds us.

to keep you from the forbidden woman,
    from the adulteress with her smooth words.

⁶ For at the window of my house
    I have looked out through my lattice,
⁷ and I have seen among the simple,
    I have perceived among the youths,
    a young man lacking sense,
⁸ passing along the street near her corner,
    taking the road to her house
⁹ in the twilight, in the evening,
    at the time of night and darkness.

¹⁰ And behold, the woman meets him,
    dressed as a prostitute, wily of heart... 

Solomon warns his son about how a man is easily enticed by what he sees.  And Solomon knew what he was talking about after all he had over 500 wives and concubines. In some ways this makes him both over qualified and perhaps also disqualified, but the advice is sound either way. In the book of proverbs he warns us about how to act when the temptation arises, because the end is always the same...

²¹ With much seductive speech she persuades him;
    with her smooth talk she compels him.
²² All at once he follows her,
    as an ox goes to the slaughter,
or as a stag is caught fast
²³     till an arrow pierces its liver;
as a bird rushes into a snare;
    he does not know that it will cost him his life.

Sometimes reaching for love before you are ready can have a tragic end. But it will always draw your heat away from God.

For us love and relationships are such a touchy subject. Because nobody is going to tell us who we can love! We just feel what we feel, right? We know this girl/dude is different! We feel it inside and that is all that matters to us. But God does have somethings to help us out with in this area. Perhaps he wants to spare us some heartache. 

I think Samson while an incredible story and important character used by God, he teaches us something about relationships.  

Look hard before you buy.

With Valentines here this is an important message.  Love is indeed in the air, but where are you sticking your nose?  The Bible has a lot to say about love and relationships if we will but listen. 

It's speaks to the timing of love.   Songs 8:4
It speaks to character of love.  1 Corinthians 13
It even speaks to the type of people to love.   2 Corinthians 6:14, 1 Corinthians 5:33, Proverbs 31
It even hints at the confines of love.   Proverbs 5:18-19, Genesis 2:24, 1 Peter 3:7, Mathew 19:3-9

If love hasn't arrived for you yet, this Valentines don't be on the look out for "love", instead work on being a person capable of loving and being loved. The time will come when love comes to town, but don't miss it because you are preoccupied with needing a date for the holiday not wanting to feel lonely. Don't let a holiday or a bad movie tempt you into making a bad decision when it comes to this area. Decisions of the heart last a long time. Don't be like Samson who ran after what his eyes told him was best, nor should we listen to Roxette for that matter and simply listen to your heart. No the Bible teaches us to engage our minds on this one. Probably because our hearts have a tendency to go overboard with this stuff.

But if love has already come to town for you then be a person worthy of being loved. Be excited because if your significant other is excited about Valentines and you both get to celebrate each other. Then read the Song of songs for some advice. Be prepared to love back despite your feelings on the holiday. When you don't, you make it about yourself, when it is about you, well then you are acting like Samson. 

Don't miss the point, the point being the other person who is excited about the day, not the day itself. 
Love isn't about you, love is about them. Your job is to love them. If you don't yet have someone make sure the other person is worthy of your heart. If you do then make sure you are taking the time to be worthy of their love. 

So as Samson failed to do, make sure the next time you let a girl cut your hair that she has your best interest in mind. 

thanks